Single? Huston, we have a problem

A few weeks ago I went to a Selah concert at a local church with a group of friends. The band, if you're not familiar with them, consists of three individuals, Todd Smith, Allan Hall, and Amy Perry. Amy is the lead singer and has an incredible voice. Between songs she shared her testimony with the audience. Amy struggles with weight loss. She decided to state the obvious to us because she had the courage to do so. She shared the story of how she struggled her whole life and even more so after having her first child to lose weight. One day a very close friend of hers committed to helping Amy lose the weight that was weighing her down emotionally and physically. She lost a substantial amount of weight and also became more spiritually healthy, too. People applauded her efforts there at the concert and you could see that she had continual support from her band-mates as well. Another example of weight loss being supported in a church setting was in an article I read about Rick Warren, author of the Purpose Driven Life and Pastor of Saddlebrook church. He discussed when he was baptizing congregants at his church he realized how overweight he and most of his members were. That next Sunday he confessed to his church about his gluttony and wanted to challenge his congregants to go on a diet with him. They all supported each other and lost a substantial amount of weight as a congregation. Please feel free to read the full article here.

There are many burdens that we all face in life. Some have weight issues, some have financial issues, marital issues, etc. But a topic that I hear rarely supported and confronted in Christian circles, churches and self-help books is the burden and struggle that some individuals have as single adults.

Christena Cleveland stated it best in her article when she said that the single life is complex and hard for some individuals to live out especially with little to no support from the Church. We are encouraged by the Church to "embrace" this time in our lives but not really taught how. There are individuals that say things such as, "don't worry, you'll be married soon, let me hook you up with my husband's best friend's daughters ex-boyfriends cousin-in-law who is single!" What if marriage isn't the prescription that we as singles need right away? What if we really do want to learn how to embrace our single moments and truly live them out the best we can? That's where my new favorite author, Mandy Hale, comes in.

For the first time I have come across a book that has taught me how to embrace my current relationship status. Ms. Hale wrote the book, The Single Woman, because she too got frustrated with there being a multitude of books on how to have a better marriage or on how to get married. She realized that there was a lack of motivational books on how to be great at being single and decided to write one herself! I get excited about a lot of things in my life, but this book has given me a soul deep excitement! Ms. Hale has helped me realize that this time in my life can be amazing - if I let it. Do I still want to get married and have kids one day? You better believe it! But that's not the only purpose that God has made me for in this life. Ms. Hale has encouraged me to "embrace" my single life by chasing my dreams and her book is full of encouragement on how to do just that.

After reading this book I again realized how desperately singles need to be encouraged and supported in the church just as much as their married counterparts or any other battle that people face. I found it refreshing and somewhat relieving that both Ms. Hale and Ms. Cleveland were bold enough to speak out in support of the single person and I agree with them. Both of these ladies have encouraged me to not only be the best I can be right now just as I am, but to look at ways that I can help people in my same situation at my own church and surrounding circles. You may be reading this and may be a married person or you may be in the same boat that I am in and I'd love to hear your feedback and suggestions on this topic. Friends, if Amy's weight loss struggle can be accepted and supported amongst the congregation and Pastor Warren can have his congregants do the same, why can't we lift up the singles in the church?

-A